Can I Remain Close with My Ex?

Its so tempting – this person has been your best friend for such a long time, how can you just cut them out of your life? The tricky thing is, for the most part, you have to. For the first little while, at least.

Time heals all wounds. This could not be more true for relationships; when you break up with someone, truly the best thing to do is avoid the reminder of them. Mute their instagram stories, don’t text them, and avoid contact – give yourself the space and time you need to heal. This can take a LONG time; for me, I always try and force a reunion too soon and end up ruining any progress I had made in getting over the person – this, in one particular instance, led to a full two years of debating whether or not we should get back together every few months because we still seemed to have such great ‘chemistry’. Don’t make the same mistakes I did. It is so easy to forget why things ended when you’re vulnerable and lonely, which is why its best just to remove that person from your existence altogether until you have really and truly moved on. I know it’s hard but in the long term, you will certainly thank yourself for it.

I’m not saying there aren’t exceptions to this rule – we’ve all heard stories of people staying close with their exes – but those situations are few and far between. Someone once said something that really stuck with me: “if you’re still good friends with your ex, you’re either still in love with them or you never were”. Again, I know there are exceptions to that rule, but being around someone who truly love and can’t be with hurts. My advice is to save yourself the pain, and give your heart some space.

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